Raising children places a strain on the emotions that many can find unexpected and overwhelming. The sleepless nights, worry, loss of social life and the financial burden can stretch even the calmest parent to their limit. But there is a lifeline - the Parent Support Group.

MAT WATSON investigates

Being a parent is a stressful business, according to Ellen Goldsmith, development worker at the Parent Support Group.

It's a sentiment almost every mother and father would agree and empathise with.

The Parent Support Group, which has branches around the Southend area, was set up 19 years ago to give help, support, advice and a shoulder to lean on for parents.

One of the group's main objectives is to help mothers and fathers enjoy their parenting and to help relieve their stress.

Members can meet with people in similar situations or those who have been through the problems they are experiencing.

Knowing there are others in the same boat can often be very comforting.

But the success of the group, which is run by the Benfleet-based Network Family Group, is down to the way it operates.

Ellen said: "We have a particular structure in our group, each of our sessions are split into various sections.

"The first hour is devoted to developing children's learning through play by involving them in craft work or painting."

She stressed the importance of parents getting involved in these activities, taking a part in their child's learning.

The parents do receive some respite, however. For three quarters of an hour the dedicated volunteers take the children off to play.

This time is specifically geared to helping parents with any problems they may have.

Worried mothers also receive advice on a wide range of topics such as how to deal with a child who is not eating or sleeping or wetting the bed.

Ellen said: "This information can be invaluable for helping them to cope if their child has a problem."

But it's not just about problems, there are other valuable lessons to be learned too.

Ellen said: "We cover a wide rage of parenting skills such as how best to play with your child and how to develop the youngsters' language through reading. We also teach how to best encourage positive behaviour patterns."

The group also gives advice on topics such as safety around the home and stress management.

Ellen said: "Being a parent is quite a stressful business. We all need all the help we can get."

The Network Family Group uses a home visit scheme to help introduce those wanting to join the parent support groups but find walking into a room full of unfamiliar faces a little daunting.

Potential members can arrange for a visit from Sue Eaton, the home visit officer, before they join.

Sue said: "This is very important. It can be quite hard for a mother to walk into a room of people they do not know so it breaks the ice and can be a lifeline to people under stress."

Debbie Thompson, 32, of Barrymore Walk, Rayleigh, attends the Parent Support Group at Rayleigh with her five-year-old son Michael.

She said: "The group is wonderful and I have made some very good friends there.

"They have given me a lot of support with my little boy. He used to be quite clingy. He would never let me leave him with anyone else.

"This meant I hardly ever had any time on my own. I was at the end of my tether. They managed to coax him away to play with someone else so I could have some peace."

She applauded the home visit scheme: "Sue visited me at home first to so there would be a familiar face for me the first time I attended.

"At my first time at the group she greeted me and introduced me to the other parents. This really broke the ice and made me feel very welcome."

She added: "I really want to thank them for all the support they have given me."

Child's play - birthday fun as youngster Danielle Plumber blows out her birthday candles during a group meeting in Southend

Picture: LUAN MARSHALL

Where is your nearest centre?

Rayleigh - St Michael's Church Hall, Sir Walter Raleigh Drive, on Mondays at 1 to 2.30pm

Westcliff - St Andrew's Church Hall, Electric Avenue, on Tuesdays at 9.45 to 11.15am

Southend - Centre Place Community Centre, Prospect Close, Kursaal Estate, on Wednesdays at 1 to 2.30pm

Rochford - St Luke's Community Centre, Dalys Road, on Thursdays at 9.45 to 11.15am

Canvey - King George's Pavilion, Blackthorne Road, on Fridays at 1 to 2.30pm

Converted for the new archive on 19 November 2001. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.