The cost of enjoying summer walks in long grass

A bit more if you want to re-sow the entire lawn? How about the price of one, single grass seed?

I keep one in a vial on my desk which cost close on £600.

Let me explain.

There can be few sights funnier than that of a dog running through long grass.

The occasional glimpse of a nose, or the tip of a tail, accompanied by the tell-tale movement of the vegetation, is one of the simple pleasures of summer days.

But now, with the longest day of the year just past, the grass is beginning to dry and the less funny side of that tableau comes to the fore – grass seeds.

If you have a smooth-coated dog, give yourself a couple of minutes to pat yourself on the head, as the chances are, the only place your pet will hide a grass seed will be in its ear.

But longer-coated hounds, especially those with slightly thicker or curly hair, can make hunt-the-grass-seed into an evening-long occupation.

Boris, for example, had a coat which was particularly long and thick around his paws. His record for grass seeds between his digits was five – all in one place.

The problem was, one of them managed to work its way through the hair and into the skin, requiring a small operation to remove it.

Georgie, a little lurcher, managed to get one stuck right down inside her ear canal – needing a little operation to remove it, twice.

And Boris, oh, yes, Boris again, even managed to get one stuck in what my American friends call his “hiney”. Being Boris, he needed another little operation. Then, because he was Boris, the first night post- op he managed to smash his buster collar and chew at his stitches, so needed a further operation to put right the damage he inflicted on himself. Total bill £600. Then there was the grass seed up the nose...

The early warning for seeds in both the nose and ear is a sound like the dog retching through its nasal cavities. If you’re lucky, and quick, and your dog is compliant, you can probably spot the offender and remove it before it disappears too far into the orifice.

If you have a dog like Boris, you may be able to spot it, but being allowed to remove it may depend on his frame of mind and whether or not there is an almost empty jar of peanut butter to distract him with, while you poke about a bit.

Best bet with Boris was to trim all the fur around his feet. We also took a surprising number of summer walks along roads.

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