LIFE for Lois Holder was pretty perfect. She was celebrating her fifth wedding anniversary with her husband, David.

Together with their children Lottie, four, and Tallulah, two, they were moving into a new house overlooking the beautiful Dedham Vale.

Their children from their previous relationships, Lois’s son, Harry, 14, and David’s son, Joe, 11, were happy and healthy. David’s business was going well. Life was good.

Then, like a bolt out of the blue, cancer struck. Lois found a lump when she went to the toilet.

She said: “It wasn’t painful, but it was uncomfortable. That’s the scary thing about cancer. I didn’t feel unwell. I didn’t have any classic symptoms.”

Her doctor said it was probably a prolapse or a polyp, nothing serious, but Lois decided to get it removed at the private Oaks Hospital, in Colchester. She said: “I was told it was a polyp and nothing to worry about.”

A few days later, however, a call from the hospital gave her the news she had anal cancer.

Lois said: “My world came crashing down. I fell to the floor. I thought I was going to die.”

Lois’s doctor said two key words to her – treatable and curable. And so it began.

David shut his office and worked from home, so he could care for Lois. Her parents, Gwenn and Barry, moved in to take care of the children.

Lois said: “I went from being broken and absolutely terrified to being completely channelled. You go into survival mode.

“I thought ‘I need to stay here for the children and David’. You get that fighting spirit.”

Lois started chemotherapy and five weeks of radiotherapy at Essex County Hospital.

She recalled: “By the end of the second week, I had no skin left. I was burned. It was excruciating to go to the toilet.”

The treatment continued for a further three weeks, leaving Lois in agonising pain. It ended two weeks before Christmas. Lois slept through most of the festive season, and after a fortnight’s break, had her final two weeks of radiotherapy.

By then, the chemotherapy had destroyed her immune system.

She contracted gastroenteritis and was hospitalised for seven days.

She said: “I was so ill, I couldn’t speak. David thought it was the end of me.”

Soon after, however, Lois turned the corner. Her three month check-up showed she was clear. So did her second check-up, three months later, the day after her 40th birthday – the best present she ever had, she maintains.

However, as a final kick in the teeth, Lois learned the cancer treatment brought on an early menopause. The physical battle seemed to be won, but the legacy of the cancer endures.

She admitted: “I’m still scared. I feel like I’m a time-bomb. It’s always there and you question yourself continually.”

For all that, Lois is determined and keen to help others, especially patients with young children.

She said: “We had to take Lottie and Tallulah to the hospital on occasions when I was having treatment.

“There was almost nothing for them to do.”

 

 

 

Gazette:

Plans for the new cancer centre at Colchester General Hospital include a family room with plenty to keep children occupied.

In the meantime, Lois is raising money to buy toys, iPads and TVs to keep children entertained at the current cancer unit.

She said: “It’s a difficult time, but if you know your children are OK, it means you can concentrate on what you have to do.”

Lois has been busy. She has organised a big charity ball later this month as part of her fundraising effort.

Afterwards, inNovember – a year on from the start of her treatment – the whole family is off to Florida for a well-deserved holiday together.

From the darkest of times, the sun is starting to come up.

 

 

LOIS’S Hollywood-style charity ball will offer music, glamour, dancing, food and wine.

It is being held at the Stoke by Nayland Hotel and Country Club on September 27, starting at 7pm.

Tickets are £60 which includes a four-course dinner, live music and dancing.

For details and tickets, call Lois, on 07867 728632 or email loismansell@hotmail.co.uk